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This week on Pretty Little Liars lots of stuff happened, but nothing gay.

In some ways that’s okay, because so far according to PLL if you’re a high school lesbian every day is Meet Hot Girls Day, we can take one week off.

Hannah is basically wearing the outfit I wear every day to work (silky white blouse, long necklace, jeans). None of this matters though because Emily is wearing A Denim Vest. After some amount of time its Time For Ian’s Funeral. Hannah’s mom says no because, well, she’s not insane and that dress is wildly inappropriate.

So she and the other girls just find even more inappropriate things to wear.

I have to go do something really important somewhere else.” So Emily takes her package home and decides to go Veronica Mars on Ian’s suicide note. Jason brings Mike home to Aria because these kids’ parents are never home and Jason and Aria have some weird sexual tension. This is a lot of plot and not very many costume changes so I’m a bit upset.

Luckily, now it’s the next day of school so everyone has to have changed their clothing. Either way, after school Emily takes herself and that gay vest back to see the delivery guy and demands answers.

However, when you’re at a funeral to support someone, there are a few basic “Fashion Funeral Don’ts” Everyone takes the funeral as a great opportunity to act really selfish.

Emily gets mad at Spencer for not taking this Ian Suicide Note thing seriously and then talks to that police guy about this.

Also, she suggests her parents hold a funeral for Ian. The important takeaway from this scene is that Caleb obviously borrowed that shirt from my ex-girlfriend. Where is the hottie-mom bank and how do I open an account there?I’m seriously trying to decide if I should call her up and ask how she got involved with the show. I’ve been worried all year you were dead.” Apparently Hannah has not failed to pick up her phone once in the last year. They have an intense mother-daughter family cry moment but I spent the whole time wondering exactly what bank she works in where it’s okay to dress like that. Caleb awkwardly sneaks out the back because family and hugging make him uncomfortable and we switch gears to Aria and Ezra role-playing student and teacher in his office. Aria takes this moment to explain to Ezra about her out of body experience.Either way, just then Hannah’s mom busts home from work all upset because, zomg, a teenager didn’t pick up her phone. Except she doesn’t actually describe an out of body experience, she describes when everything feels like it’s in slow motion. If you dress it up, you could wear it out to a gay bar.Which is probably why, after Fitzyboy’s ex-fiance busts in, the two love birds agree to start telling people about their undying love.This plan makes perfect sense except for the part where one of them has to time travel so Aria’s not a minor anymore.

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