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I worry that the parent is thinking about getting his or her half of the pie, not about the children. That might mean a schedule that is a week on and a week off, Wednesday through Saturday, every Thursday and Friday over night, or dividing the school year and the summers. Its not that she wants to see one more than the other.And there are a million other options, many of which I discuss in my book, The Truth about Children and Divorce. I believe she just wants more options, and sometimes her father can be a little narcissistic and will put himself first before thinking about what our daughter wants. If at all possible, I want children to spend a lot of time - and have good relationships - with both of their parents after a separation or divorce.
When I hear a parent insisting on exactly 50/50, I really worry. I consider about 25% of overnights as being joint physical custody in terms of having enough opportunity to have a rich relationship with your children. The Father and I do our best to stay on the same page, but no matter what every house is different.Admittedly, existing research is imperfect and very hard to do.But this "best and worst" conclusion also is commonly held by seasoned practitioners, and it makes good common sense.I don't have the time to go into detail; however, I am doing research to support my opinion that joint physical custody is the best way.As a child from a hostile 5 and a half year divorce, my brothers and me went through almost every custody scenario in the state of Florida. You see one parent most of the time and the other hardly at all.